she: "Where are you headed?"
me: "Prince Rupert."
she: "What's the nature of your visit?"
me: "Just passing through on my way to Alaska. I have a ferry to catch on Tuesday."
she (with suspicion): "This coming Tuesday?"
me (matter-of-factly):"Yes. I have a reservation on the Alaska Marine Highway out of Rubert, sailing at 8am."
She turned and looked at her pale partner, who I'm guessing was in training, and picked up the phone. In the glass-walled room behind where we sat, a man in a short sleeve shirt, dark glasses and loud tie picked up the phone.
me: "Is there a problem?"
she: motions one moment with her finger, then hangs up. "You can't get to Prince Rupert by Tuesday."
me: "Why not?
she: "do you know how far it is to Prince Rupert?"
me: "no, but I have my Milepost book in the truck and I can go get it..."
she:"it's 2,000 kilometers"
me: "how many miles is that?"
she: "I don't know but you can't make it in 2 days.
me: "I have to make it in 2 days. I have a reservation..."
she: "how much money do you have?"
I reached into my rear pocket and pulled out my billfold, swollen with small bills, and handed her the wad.
me: "would you like to count it?" (I was getting a little irritated).
Both of the young, pale women recoiled in unison, throwing their hands up and gasping. I felt like I'd discovered "border patrol repellent" without trying.
she: "we can't touch your money!" she said emphatically.
I'd finally gotten to them.
Pale, border patrol agent number one picked up the phone again, had a conversation I couldn't hear with the man in the loud tie, then hung up.
she: "You're free to go now."
...(please click next image)